Regarding the to getting forms, i. However book titles are allowed artistic license. So, i like getting/ to get to the station in plenty of time.
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1) getting messed up = refers to becoming whatever the condition is (in a bad situation) to get messed up or getting messed. To get is the normal form and would be best for everyday use. He did not succeed in getting the job though he tried his level best.
In your exact context, the real underlying implication is probably more don't go too fast for your dating partner rather than.for.
In grammar in use book, the bold part has been considered as correct answer.