1) getting messed up = refers to becoming whatever the condition is (in a bad situation) to get messed up or getting messed. However book titles are allowed artistic license. So, i like getting/ to get to the station in plenty of time.
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In grammar in use book, the bold part has been considered as correct answer. In your exact context, the real underlying implication is probably more don't go too fast for your dating partner rather than.for. Regarding the to getting forms, i.
He did not succeed in getting the job though he tried his level best.
To get is the normal form and would be best for everyday use.